Trigger warning: this article contains graphic information regarding programming and trauma and could be triggering to cult/mind control survivors
When a survivor of mind control enters therapy, their trainers will be notified (often by the survivor themselves, since they frequently “report in”), and specific programming to block therapy with their current therapist will begin to be put into place. This will be layered in addition to the generic “no heal” programming that all survivors have installed that prevents unauthorized system access, or any communication between presentation (front) parts and the cult host or systems.
Therapy blockers are highly programmed to completely resist therapy, will often have programming specific to the therapist the survivor is currently seeing, and are extremely bonded to their trainers. They are highly motivated to prevent healing due to the fear of trauma (abuse) to the survivor, and the even greater fear of losing contact with their loved one (the trainer the individual was bonded to).
Generic No Heal Programming
When the survivor is an infant, and throughout childhood, they will be put through mock “therapy” sessions and deliverance sessions in which the “therapist” (a cult actor) kindly asks the child to share information and encourages them to disclose their abuse. Later in the setup, the child is then tortured for talking and disclosing, is raped by the mock therapist, and is “hospitalized” (see the section on Crazy Alice programming) to punish them for “making up” memories that “couldn’t possibly be true”. In order to heal, the survivor must choose to push past this programming to enter therapy at all, unless they have been sent on a mission for this purpose (some survivors are sent to infiltrate the practices of therapists who are effective and learn about how they work, in order to help the cult understand how to block therapy with the therapist).
In addition to the above, the survivor will see setups in which for every disclosure they make, a loved one is tortured horrifically, sending the message: “if you talk, your loved ones will be hurt.” This basically shuts down healing for many.
Specific Therapy Blocking Programming
Each therapist has an individual style of working with people, and this may be used against the survivor. Because most survivors are still cult active when they enter therapy, during “tune ups” (reprogramming sessions), the cult will attempt to make the survivor fear disclosure in therapy by doing the following:
- Create a VR of the therapist abusing the client following personal disclosure (shocks, rapes, etc.)
- Have an actor that looks similar to the therapist, trained to use the therapist’s favorite phrases to encourage therapy, who does mock therapy with the survivor. Each phrase used (over and over) is combined with shock, rape or other torture to the survivor, so when they hear it, they will recoil in pain and disgust.
- Create a VR of the therapy room, and then have the “therapist” avatar perform rituals there, to convince the survivor that the therapist is “one of us” and therefore not safe to disclose to.
A survivor often must overcome an enormous amount of programming to trust a therapist at all, especially since during the time they still have contact with the cult, they and their loved ones will be tortured every time they attempt to heal during reprogramming sessions.
If the survivor does choose to trust the therapist, they need to be aware that some people (but thankfully not all) drawn to providing therapy or support for DID, trauma, and ritual abuse are programmed cult members who job is to access survivors seeking to get out. It is not unusual for the “supporter” to later discover that he/she is actually DID and programmed as well, as time goes on. It can be difficult to determine at first whether the blocks to therapy are coming because of programmed setups such as those described above, or because the survivor (legitimately, at times) does not feel safe with the therapist.
This is why choosing a therapist is a matter for prayer, discernment and seeking input from a safe person (if the therapist knows one) regarding who to see.
Because of the above programming, survivors will often attempt to block therapy using different methods. These fears are genuine, and should not be minimized; instead, the survivor needs support and prayer from individuals they trust, as they work through the issues.
Typical Therapy Blocking Programs
When a therapist works with a survivor, they will see a lot of ambivalence: the survivor wants to heal, but part(s) of the survivor is avoiding the healing quite energetically. This can cause a lot of frustration in both the survivor, and the therapist, who over time may begin to wonder “Why don’t you just heal?” The survivor may experience tremendous internal conflicts between their entire worldview and experience, and the information that a therapist challenges this worldview with. In addition, the survivor will be emotionally invested in saving loved ones, who they believe are being tortured each time they break programming.
This ambivalence and internal conflict can cause the survivor to display any or all of the following programmed responses in therapy:
- Cycling through parts over and over (rolodexing): this is a symptom of extreme system distress and conflict, as parts of the survivor are attempting to heal and incorporate new information, while other parts are terrified that the programming is breaking. This rapid switching is a sign that internal controllers are trying to stop doing their jobs (including hiding internal pain), and that they are “failing” at doing their old job; as a result, they are feeling terror and are attempting to send out part after part to present in rapid succession. Rolodexing can also be a punishment program that causes the survivor to look completely dysfunctional, and be used to reinforce the belief (which is a lie) that the survivor is “going insane”, etc. Rolodexing will stop once the “hot topic” in therapy is dropped; this can be an opportunity to journal and work on the topic, since it is obviously important to healing or the system would not respond in this way.
- Only one memory comes up: some survivors go through weeks, months and even years processing only one or two memories that cycle through again and again, even though they recognize they were raised in a cult group. This is a way of blocking therapy, since the survivor never gets past that one memory to do other work inside.
- House that Jack Built: This is a specific form of blocking, in which the survivor cycles through bits and pieces of one memory, and each time, must repeat the same sequence in order before they can add new information to the memory. The survivor will appear to need to completely recount the previous information given before they can look at any new information regarding the memory, which can be wearing on both the survivor and therapist.
- False Christian work: If the survivor is working with a Christian therapist or deliverance ministry, they will pull out their false “god” “jesus” and “holy spirit” to “help” with the healing. They may be praying wholeheartedly, praying warfare prayers, doing daily Bible study, agreeing with the therapist, and reporting visions of “jesus” intervening inside and how “close” they feel to “god” during therapy. The problem is that they are not praying to the real Christian God who has the authority to heal, deliver and bring breakthrough, and this survivor will often leave therapy frustrated, wondering why God doesn’t answer in spite of all the praying they are doing. This is heavily linked to anti-Christian programming (please see article on this topic).
- False integrations: If the survivor is on a mission to bond with the therapist, learn their techniques, and later report to the cult the therapy methods used, they will want the therapist to feel good about seeing them. This is often accomplished through false integrations (the survivor is completely unaware that it is a program), in which dozens, hundreds or more of parts are “miraculously joined together” without any trauma (or memories), and the survivor expresses deep gratitude about the “tremendous healing” they have received. This type of work can also be a response to a huge need to please a prayer or deliverance minister who pressures the survivor to integrate before they are ready. While God can and does accomplish the miraculous, most true integrations bring back life history, both good and bad, and resolve core conflicts and false beliefs that fueled the dissociation.
- Therapy sabotage: with this programming, the survivor will be late to appointments, may miss scheduled appointments, may “forget” to pay for therapy, does not do therapeutic homework, and verbalizes wanting to drop out. A subset of this program is distancing the therapist/supporter through methods such as pulling out sexual parts who attempt to “seduce” the therapist; pulling out hostile/rude/unpleasant parts who pick fights, assault the therapist, or tear the therapist down verbally, and even threaten to sue the therapist if they become desperate.
- Shutdown programming: At times, a survivor who is still in contact with the cult will be given a shutdown/stop healing command. When this is running, the survivor will experience the following:
- Is completely unable to communicate with parts inside
- Is unable to journal, collage or do artwork
- Feels intense anxiety at the thought of doing internal work
- Wants to be “normal” and “forget about healing”, wants a “real life” and chooses to leave therapy, sometimes permanently (note: this is different from taking a short break from therapy or healing, which is normal at times)
This form of programming is frustrating for both the survivor and therapist, since it seems to be a waste of therapy time working with someone who cannot communicate with parts and does not even seem motivated to do any internal work at all. To resolve this, the survivor needs to look at where access occurred, how the shutdown command was given (including subliminals or texts online or by phone), and what threats were used to accomplish the shutdown (frequently, this will be a double bind being threatened).
- Pulling out false issues to work on (cover issues): It is common for survivors, especially early in their healing, to work on cover programming to prevent their going deeper into their system. The survivor may only remember their American host family; or believe that they were only sexually abused, or abused by an organized cult group for a few years, then “let go when they moved away from home” or “married someone outside the group” (which almost never happens in reality).
Until the survivor goes past the cover, and is able to work with the true programming and beliefs that run the system, healing will be sporadic and difficult, and they will be vulnerable to reaccess. The survivor must be willing do internal work, including journaling and asking the LORD to uncover the truth, regardless of what it is. They must be willing to go “all out” for the LORD, and trust their loved ones in the group to His care, as they go past guardians, system blocks, demonic blocks and learn what is actually inside.
- Doubt: Belief that the survivor will never heal: This is programming designed to knock out the effectiveness of work done by the survivor and therapist/supporter. This programming will be installed with setups in which the child is told to “heal” or “break the programming” under command – and then experiences horrendous pain and terror (through VR or tech torture). The child in numerous setups is told to “integrate” and again, pain, terror and hopelessness is installed. This is layered in many times over the years. When the survivor does try to heal in therapy, they will often re-experience these feelings of pain, hopelessness and futility regarding healing, or even the possibility of God answering their prayers to heal.
The survivor will also have been shown videos of individuals in lab settings attempting to break the programming that was installed in them – and the people viewed in the setups go “insane”, or “die”. They will be shown the readouts for the slow, agonizing death, to instill the belief that the programming can never be broken. In actuality, if that was really true, the programmers would not have to install this false belief. It can help the survivor to understand that their situation is different: unlike the individuals they watched trying to break programming in a facility dedicated to demons, the survivor has a God that loves them and can heal anything, safety, and support that the people they watched did not have.
- Emotional flooding that does not promote healing: Some survivors will present in therapy appearing to be willing to heal, but the instant that any memory comes forward, they will burst into tears and appear to “melt down” for what can amount to the entire therapy session, wailing over their guilt and self-condemnation. While emotions will come with the recall of traumatic memories (and should), seeing hours of therapy “hijacked” by a part crying every time the survivor comes to therapy could be a sign that this is running.
The supporter or therapist may want to gently confront or challenge this part regarding their job within the system, and see if the survivor is willing to work past this program. The survivor will need to become aware if it is running, and break any agreements to have this part step forward if anything is disclosed. The traumas that created this response in what is often a very young part will also need to be resolved.
- Child presentation: Normally, the infants and children in a mind-controlled system are heavily protected and guarded, and do not come out in therapy until trust and safety have been established over time. A completely young presentation is highly abnormal, and can be the result of several things:
- Programming breakdown: some survivors literally “burn out”, especially if they have been heavily used in the field on missions, and too much “wipe out” and other amnesia programming of presenters afterwards can cause a situation in which the adults are too tired/traumatized to present, and children come forward
- Mission programming: some survivors are programmed to present with children in order to seem “harmless” and “cute” as they infiltrate a church or therapy organization. This is a programmed in presentation, with great trauma.
- Secondary reward: some systems have been heavily rewarded by abusers for “staying young” and childlike, especially if the main abuser was a pedophile. The survivor may have starved themselves as a child/teen in order to prevent the appearance of breasts and delay the onset of menses, and to keep their childlike physical appearance. This is often a system highly dependent upon others, and they may look to therapists and supporters to “caretake” them as an adult.
- Constant crises with no resolution (burn out the support): This is difficult programming to endure for the survivor, because the survivor has no idea that this is happening. All they know is that they are in deep distress, and want to pick up the phone and call the only person that can help them (the therapist or support person). There will be crises during the healing journey; but a life of constantly cycling into crisis week after week could be an indication that something is wrong. This type of programming is designed to “burn out” the supporter, who becomes exhausted helping someone who never seems to heal.
- Denial: Every survivor will have some form of denial programming, and parts inside will hold this job. Denial parts are among the most cult loyal, and deeply fear the torture or death of loved ones (including trainers) in the cult. Denial parts will often verbalize the following:
- It wasn’t that bad
- I’m exaggerating things
- I’m making this up; I have a creative, sick imagination
- I’m not dissociative
- I’m just seeking attention
- This is all for secondary gain; I’ve been playing with your head
- I’m a liar
This part will have been heavily programmed since the survivor was in the womb to say these things – and believe them. They are part of the primary amnesia triad for presentations (denial, doubt and despair) that keep the survivor from truly believing their own memories.
Healing of denial means finding why these parts (often represented in numerous systems, including next to the core) are so invested in doing their job, i.e. who they are protecting, and why. They will be heavily bonded to a primary bond, and thus will be unwilling (or unable, due to amnesia agreements) to disclose who they are protecting until safety and trust are established with the therapist, and with the true God.
- “I don’t know”: It is normal for an individual to not know what is going on inside at times, or to be unable to answer questions they or a therapist asks parts from time to time. But there may also be parts created who literally “know nothing” who are brought forward in response to asking any information that might be helpful to healing, or breaking programming. These parts normally will have no history, and be unaware of anything at all. Controllers may bring them out in order to prevent healing work during a therapy session; or to prevent journaling and finding answers.
These parts will have been created with trauma, and will have made agreements to not know anything, and to forget any important information. They may be formed during childhood during anti-interrogation training, since these parts are not lying: they literally do not know anything, and so cannot reveal high-security information.
Healing will involve working through the traumas with a trustworthy individual, and helping these parts realize that the system is not being threatened, and there is no longer any punishment for sharing information inside. This can take time, and these parts will usually gradually stop doing their jobs quite as energetically once they realize that the individual is safe, and that the sharing of information inside promotes safety.