I am writing these autobiographical articles to help others understand how international occultic societies program their members. The information in the articles is specific to the group I was raised in, but many of the methods described are used by other groups.
Trigger Warning: this article contains graphic descriptions of trauma and programming setups
At age three, the others in my group and I graduated from the white tunics we wore, to longer brown tunics (what acolytes in the order wear). This showed we were no longer infants and toddlers, and our training would progress with greater expectations.
At this time, I began to spend regular time at a monastery north of Rome that is very old and ancient, and not part of the “public” tours. The monastery is completely walled in with high walls. Inside, it was beautiful, with a walled in garden and bench on one side; a circular fountain in front of the main doorway inside, and flowers. The grounds were kept immaculately.
I was there to learn numerous things, including discipline (I learned to scrub the stone floors on my hands and knees without complaining; every once in a while, I would finish scrubbing, and to teach me humility, a father would come and urinate on the floor, and tell me to do it again. Normally, though, the tasks were completed and I could go to class.
At this time, I went into classes for part of each day (the preschoolers are genetically enhanced and highly intelligent, and go for four hours a day), where I learned languages, oral history, and how to read and write (I could do so by age three and a half, in several languages). I was also learning martial arts (one of my favorite classes at the time), and military skills, including how to take apart and put together a gun, how to shoot a target; how to defend myself against an attack dog; the use of various poisons, basic field first aid, how to climb over barriers, running, how to follow someone without being noticed, and other skills.
Amnesia and “Don’t Talk” programming
I was also undergoing extensive amnesia programming at this time. In one setup, a father would come into the room, talk to someone else, and I was given a forget code by the father as he left. Later, I would be asked what I remembered. If I remembered anything at all, the father (who was someone I loved) was brought in and tortured in front of me (to show the “effect” of “remembering” on others). In one setup, I was switched through several parts in succession while doing a small “mission”; later each part was quizzed regarding whether they remembered any part of the sequence that they shouldn’t. One time, they did; then the Father I loved held a gun to my head, and told me, “If you keep remembering, I will have to shoot you; we can’t afford a security risk like this, much as it would hurt me to do this.” I had seen a child shot for remembering too much (too much bleedthrough), so I knew the threat was real. The next time, I had complete amnesia when taken through sequences. My parts had gotten the message.
There were other amnesia setups, such as the “Remember the Flowers” setup (where the pool in the garden was filled with the partially submerged bodies of children and adults who I “remembered”, some were doubles of myself and my classmates, as well as fathers I loved; the pool was also filled with water lilies). Each child represented a “flower” and the warning was to not remember, or they would be killed.
Because age 3 is a time when the child is very creative, many internal structures put in previously were heavily reinforced. These included internal trees (Tree of Life, Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, and Cruz, or the Cross of false martyrdom); the Garden of Eden, including the snake, Adam, Eve and Lillith (the first mother of all witchcraft, also called “Adam’s second wife” by the programmers).
At this time, the spiritual programming was also heavily reinforced for various systems. These included:
- Babylonian programming: deities, rituals and learning how to do sacrifices to the deities was done. These included Ashtoth, Bel, Ashtaroth, Molech and others. In one programming ritual, the child has hundreds of golden needles with wires inserted, and is hung from this series of wires in a very painful sun ritual (to Bel).
- Egyptian programming: deities and parts were reinforced, and sacrifices to Ra, Horus, Set and others was taught. For each of these “classes” the oral history of the cultures was also given. Internal pyramids with altars were installed, and chambers where the various parts lived internally were created. I was left in a re-creation of an ancient Egyptian chamber, chained to an altar; it was a rough night indeed, as I was terrorized by actors portraying “demons” and “Egyptian gods”. This trauma reinforced the programming, and was meant to make it very difficult to remember.
- Ancient Ones programming: these were very old earth deities, with many appearing as giants in groves overseen by “ancient ones” with white hair and mage or high witchcraft/warlock skills.
- Q’bala programming: this was also installed to a greater degree during this time, with the three trees tied to the delta computer logic system.
- Druid programming: This programming was conducted in ancient groves, and included learning the appropriate sacrifices, how to set the stones in a magic circle, and being tied to a very large and old oak tree for the night.
Throughout these years, I was also taught how to perform rituals and sacrifices, learning how to dissect first a corpse, and later a living human being (homeless people were used in the school for these purposes). By the time I was six, I had dissected and learned how to carve a cadaver and living person expertly, how to peel skin (a torture technique), and other “skills”. I knew all of the major organs, circulatory and nervous system structures, and nerve points. I was becoming very skilled at torture. At first, as a young child, I would turn white, or even vomit, but soon learned that this was not tolerated, and learned to dissociate my feelings.
All children in the group I was raised in have at least basic competency as a trainer or programmer. This training also continued in the “lab” time, and included instructional classes where my classmates and I were allowed to watch the older trainers and ask questions. We were also taught skills on homeless people and others considered less valuable, learning how to install programming; read brain scans and monitor responses. By age six, I had significant basic competency as a trainer, and could install many basic programs successfully.
Learning to Hate Traitors and Anti-Interrogation (setups)
Because loyalty was so basic to the order, my classmates and I were taught to heavily fear and hate traitors through setups that included:
- “traitors” breaking into the monastery and attempting to rape my classmates and I and set fire to the room. We fought them off, but they began overpowering us, until the Fathers came and drove them away
- Running away setup: all children become angry with the fathers during their training, and are allowed to “run away” with a setup . I “ran away” in anger, trying to escape my abuse at the monastery, and was picked up by friendly people who offered to take me to “safety”. I agreed, and they drove me to another town. That night, and for the next three days, I was abused non-stop in terrible ways, until I managed to “escape” while they were sleeping, and was found and taken home to the monastery by the Fathers, who said they had been “sick with worry” about me. They would then ask me what my punishment should be for worrying them this way; once decided, the father would then go through half of the punishment for me (to show their “love). This setup was designed to teach me that the outside world was much worse than what I was undergoing, and to teach me to mistrust and hate “outsiders.”
- During military setups, during which we camped out after marching all day, at times I would be “abducted” by an “enemy” (non-member of the order) who would spend time interrogating me. As a preschooler, this involved simple levels of torture, and refusal to answer questions. Later, I would manage to “escape” and the Fathers would rescue me, take me back to the monastery, and praise me for my “bravery” under torture, etc.
Learning to “rescue” others
Learning to rescue loved ones is a critical skill and belief system taught, since so much programming involves rescue of not only the self, but loved ones, from trauma, torture or death. These setups often involved doing something considered very “disobedient” (al l children do from time to time; the anger and rage from the constant abuse leaks out, and they defy orders or do things to act out their pain; this is expected and planned for). Upon defying an order, I was ordered to be flogged with a whip that had small bits of bone attached (a flagellum, a favorite punishment of the Jesuits). I realized that the amount of whipping ordered would likely cost my life (I had defied very badly). But then, the Father I loved most stepped in, and said “I will take the punishment for you.” I was stunned. He was flogged until his skin was stripped and bleeding, looking at me the whole time with a loving face. I cried and screamed, and this reinforced for me the belief that if you love someone, you will take their pain for them.
Over the years, I learned to do this myself, in setup after setup, until the ultimate ones in which the Father I loved most asked “I know it will hurt badly, but are you willing to die for me?” I was four, and I said “Yes”. I allowed him to put me to death, then resurrect me with resuscitation equipment and spiritual means. He then said “Now we are tied by death and life.” I literally trusted him with my life. The main thing is that out of my great love (for this individual who manipulated me) I willingly agreed to the death and resuscitation. This is foundational for programming, because the individual must agree before it can be truly successful.
Green House (MI6)
At age 3 ½, I was taken to Green House (named after Col. Green of MI6) for the first time, with my classmates, for training. Green House is rented out to various groups for training at times, with the purpose of my undergoing the Green House training to be an agent. At this time, my delta computer system programming was also layered upon the base programs set up in the womb and during infancy, using the sophisticated computerized technology there. I was literally hooked up to a computer, and for days, taught to simulate everything it did internally. My delta parts learned to talk with a computerized flat affect, and to perform internal system checks, to store information in various security layers, etc. I also improved my skills with a gun, a knife and other abilities.
Introduction to the Vatican School
At age six, I was already a competent trainer (programmer), with the ability to program others with basic programs. I knew human anatomy inside out, was skilled at torturing others in numerous ways, was learning various rituals, and had already performed several assassination missions (the first one completed at age 4; I was deadly as a child, which the order counted on, since no one would suspect a child that young). I had been hosted in several countries around the world for three years now and was building up my covers in those countries. I was now ready to enter the Vatican school.